It's Covered: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear

i've got a big review of yesterday's DC stop for the Rock the Bells tour coming soon, but what's the point of co-owning a blog if you can't take time out to wish The Missus a happy second wedding anniversary? A lot of people lost money on that bet, i tell you what.

In honor of two years of wedded bliss, a quick It's Covered on the Randy Newman classic, "Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear." The Missus and i have a running joke about getting eaten by bears, which probably isn't that funny if you were friends with this guy, but it's a laugh riot to us regardless. You go hang out in Alaska meeting your in-laws, and tell me the thought doesn't cross your mind. Then have your father-to-be draw a pistol on what turns out to be a leafy stump swaying in the breeze. It's a knee slapper, i tell you what.

While Newman penned it, it was first performed by Harpers Bizarre and, with the change of an article, was made classic overseas by Alan Price (though if you're from the States and about my age, you might credit its true international success to Scooter, Rowlf and Fozzie).

i'll let you decide for yourself.

mp3: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear (Randy Newman from Sail Away)

mp3: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear (Harpers Bizarre from The Platinum Collection)

mp3: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear (Harry Nilsson from Harry)

mp3: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear (Okkervil River from Golden Opportunities mixtape)

mp3: Simon Smith and the Amazing Dancing Bear (The Muppets from The Muppet Show - The 25th Anniversary Collection)

mp3: Simon Smith and His Amazing Dancing Bear (Alan Price from The Best Of)

mp3: Simon Smith and His Amazing Dancing Bear (The Animals from Perform Price)

(Ed. Note: Today's Blog-on-Blog love gets you sticky from She'll Grow Back, who longtime readers will remember inspired this column in the first place, thereby giving you the correct answer to the upcoming LET version of Trivial Pursuit.)

The Guest Room Works

Because it's my blog, and i'll write about whatever i damn well please, we had our first vistors at the new crib this past weekend, with one particularly special guest, blogger extraordinaire, Maxwell "The Hammer" Cooper, keeping the groove alive at all times. i'm sure you're saying, Jebus, what kind of guest room does a guy like Terrible Chris have?

As the picture proves, only the most tricked out mutha on the planet, baby.*

You're jealous. i know this, man.

Now i only have to turn the basement into a faithful replica of Flynn's Arcade, and i'm styling, fo sho.

This one's for you, Hammer.

mp3: House Guest (Jim Gaffigan from King Baby)

mp3: Happiness Hotel (The Muppets from The Muppet Show - The 25th Anniversary Collection)

mp3: Hotel Bill (Groucho Marx from A Night at the Opera)

*And i forgot to take a picture of the tauntaun sleeping bag also in the room, damn it, which only makes it one billion times cooler still.

It's Covered: When the River Meets the Sea

Every year, the networks trudge out the same old holiday specials. You've got your tried and true Chuck Brown and his pathetic tree and the Grinch fucking with the Whos, as well as some newer numbers, like Shrek, making a bid for "classic" status. Back when i was knee high to a grasshopper, there was a show that helped "make it" Christmas for me every year which, sadly, no longer sees the light of syndicated day. As any Gen Xer worth his salt would know, i'm obviously talking about Emmett Otter's Jug-Band Christmas. This is old school Muppetry at its finest--Jim was still live and kickin' and Walt Inc. hadn't gotten their nasty little fingers into that marionette puppet pie. HBO ran the show for a number of Christmases past, but hasn't in forever. i'm guessing it has something to do with the aforementioned Disney buy-out, but who knows?

Regardless, the show had a number of winner tracks. One might even be on the verge of that "classic" status. For those of you in the know, i'm obviously talking about "When the River Meets the Sea," though i wouldn't have faulted you if you thought i meant "Riverbottom Nightmare Band." While the track was written by Paul Williams for the Emmett Otter special and later covered by John Denver and the Muppets for that kick ass Christmas album, it actually isn't about Christmas or even the holidays at all. It's about dying and leaving this mortal coil, so you know the kids loved it immediately.

For your listening pleasure, we have two versions from Ma Otter herself, plus JD and the Muppets, AND a take by none other than Rose Polenzani (that's OK, i didn't know who she was, either). Whilst enjoying, i strongly recommend chowing down on some of Momma's barbecue, but that may just be me.

mp3: When the River Meets the Sea (Ma Otter from Emmett Otter's Jug-Band Christmas)

mp3: When the River Meets the Sea (Ma Otter and Emmett Otter's Jug-Band from Emmett Otter's Jug-Band Christmas)

mp3: When the River Meets the Sea (John Denver and the Muppets from A Christmas Together)

mp3: When the River Meets the Sea (Rose Polenzani, live on WERS, 3/13/07)

(Ed. note: continuing our blog-on-blog lovefest of late, a special shout out to another of our faves, She'll Grow Back, for assistance procuring the EOJB soundtrack. Longtime loiterers will recall that these are the cats that inspired It's Covered in the first place, so you can blame/thank Mark over there accordingly by checking out his blog. His Stagger Lee Saturdays alone are worth the price of admission.)