Wednesday, January 6, 2010

It's Covered: The Nurse Who Loved Me

i just realized it been days since i updated the masses via music on the current status of my health. As i have no doubt that this has caused many of you to lapse into complete disarray worrying about me, let me rectify the situation.

To recap, i'm on a bunch of blood thinners for the next few months. Additionally and in no way related, i slipped a disc and have a pinched nerve. Due to the blood thinners, however, i'm S.O.L. on the back pain. They want to give me cortisone shots, but are afraid of blood seepage into the injection point or some such thing. Since it's a pinched nerve, PT won't help. Therefore, they've got me on pain meds. As none of my doctors ever confer with one another (though they lie to my face and tell me they do), i got a call from the back doctor's nurse yesterday that went a little something like this.

"Sir, I see that you've requested a refill on some pain meds. Didn't the cortisone shot work?"

"Yeah, I explained to the doctor that I'm going to be on blood thinners for the next one to four months, so no shot before that."

"Have you tried physical therapy yet?"

"Well, the doctor told me that PT wouldn't help."

"It won't help with the pain, but it might increase your core strength. I've already prescribed two more pain med refills, but we'd like you to try out the PT."

"So it's not going to help the only reason I need the meds?"


Makes sense to me.

Ladies and gentlemen, let's give a big round of applause to our medical professionals.

Just remember, kids, drugs make us strong and cool. Better living through chemistry, i always say.

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